Ahhh!!! The dichotomy of that invention! And here I find myself at the crossroads of what it offers. I remember the day I set up my account...the initial confusion, the internal debate over why I was doing this (which of course was because of a wonderful gal I met who happened to be from Poland and currently lives in Brazil and how on earth else would I maintain contact with her?!), the enjoyment of locating people I hadn't seen in a couple of decades and the virtual linking of myself and random pictures to those people I see everyday anyways. I fell into the thrill of acquiring those "friends" on my list and watching my friend list quickly climb to well over 300 as I became reacquainted to so many people I had lost touch with. I also questioned the unanswered "de-friending" that occurs and did the same to those that I decided, for whatever reason, didn't really need to be part of THE list. Statuses changed and were updated, anger and personal information was regularly posted, emotional angst was vaguely referred to, and birthday wishes well received. I found myself doing what so many linked to facebook do...I was regularly logging in to see what everyone was up to, view updated pictures of adventures from all over the world, shared witty comments that simply could not be kept to myself, and vied for the support that I so desperately needed during a very difficult time and adequately received.
Then come the recent studies and research regarding facebook and how it affects real relationships. It has been said that 1 out of 5 divorces now cites facebook as a reason. The number of affairs, not just literal physical affairs but the extensive emotional affairs, that have come from facebook are staggering. I personally can count several people that I have know closely who have fallen to this prey. Church leaders have counseled against it galore and that doesn't even touch the number of secular counselors, therapists, and experts who have the same warning. Everyone thinks they are exempt...fool proof. But are they?
So, here I am. Conflicted. Wondering. What is it that facebook really does for me nowadays? I can't negate the people with whom I have reconnected or the events I am made aware, but how much time am I spending on keeping up with people I only see via status updates versus the people that are physically present? Where should my efforts lie? Here's the thing...I've got this great life! I've got this great husband who shows me daily how much he loves me and would never hurt me like I was hurt for so long. He talks to me and listens to what I have to say. My kids are these amazing creatures with views and thoughts and opinions and struggles of their own who openly and willingly want to discuss them with me. I have great friends who share their lives with me and care about mine. Do they number in the 300's? No. Does that matter? I've decided not. Nor do I ever want to give a single one of those people reason to pause and wonder about my facebook doings. Life is in such a different place than it ever has been before...and I'm awarded the privilege and honor of being in relationships that are real and good. So why wouldn't I spend every possible minute nourishing those instead of the ones online? I love my facebook friends...and the acquaintances that have come through that modern avenue. And yet my efforts are so much better appreciated in real, physical, status update-free life.
So, facebook, you and I are in the process of redefining our relationship. I'm not sure where that definition will lead us. And yet I know that if there is someone that cares enough about our relationship then I will know when they have given birth to a baby regardless of their status updates. Here's to living in the here...the now...the real...with what matters.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Friday, January 6, 2012
I have good intentions...
Yes. It appears to be the case. Another Christmas has come and gone without me actually SENDING my cards. I did write the letter! I even printed it on paper and picked the picture and uploaded it for order. Unfortunately, I am lacking in follow-thru a great deal. So, the letter is to follow. Maybe next year...
Dear Family and Friends,
Can we just start with a great big “WOW”?! OK…so it’s been a couple years. I stand remiss at my Christmas card neglect and am back with a self-proclaimed vengeance. Brevity is not my forte, but I will do my best.
The last couple years have been tumultuous at best, but the past is mostly the past. On to bigger, brighter, happier things! Langdon and I were married in August. It was a semi-impromptu event with near-by family and friends…and couldn’t have been more perfect. There was a lot that led up to that moment, but ultimately it was just the beginning of the story we are writing one chapter at a time. Langdon moved to Surprise and we are just enjoying our new life together…figuring out details and enjoying being together. It’s been a wonderful thing for both of us to find a true partner and companion in life.
Langdon was working in Tucson, but got a job in the valley shortly after we married. He actually is now working at the same hospital I am which has been great in many ways. I finally finished nursing school in March and was fortunate enough to have a job offer prior to graduation. I am working and was able to get a job on a Progressive Care Unit and a cardiac floor as an RN at Banner Thunderbird Hospital and mostly love it. I love meeting the patients and feel blessed that I was able to get into this line of work. I also coached diving again this year and, again, am professing my retirement! We will see how that plays out in July.
The kids are all doing great and adjusting well. Garrett is 15 and has his driving permit. He dabbled in Cross Country at school and is now on the wrestling team. I think more than any of them he enjoys the role of “kid” again since Langdon came into the picture. Cole is 14 and a freshman in high school. He has discovered his love for horses and increased his love for all animals. He has changed so much this last year and has really started to come into his own. Blake is 11 and not shy about voicing his imminent 12th birthday. He is playing tackle football this year and loving that. I don’t love it quite as much. He is doing great in school and definitely has a knack for sarcasm and wit. Ethan is 9 and just such a joy to have around. He is incredibly athletic and not happy that I won’t allow him yet to play tackle football due to his size. He has a crazy pension for Beyblades and just the best smile with those great big boy teeth! Wade is 7 and has grown so much this last year. He is doing well in school and working hard at becoming the “youngest” boy instead of the “baby”. He’s accepting his new responsibilities and yet is still Mom’s “baby”. He still loves to sit and cuddle and talk about his day. His insight can be surprising.
Langdon has 4 kids of his own that we added to the already existing chaos. His oldest is Cami who is 15 and a sophomore in high school. Then there’s Logan who has also moved to Surprise and lives with us. He is 13 and in 8th grade. He has an incredible vocabulary and uses it constantly. He is incredibly witty and can definitely challenge my sarcasm. He fits in with the rest of the boys! Madison is 11 and will be 12 a week after Blake will. She is a tremendous artist and is often found drawing anything from animals to word mosaics. She’s adjusting to me being excited about having girls around. Summer is 3 and is gracious enough to allow me to dress her up to my heart’s content! She has this amazing red curly hair and is a joy to have around. She holds her own with the boys, the boys treat her like the little girl that she is, and I look forward to watching her grow.
All of us have had a good time getting to know each other and adjust to the new “family” dynamic. We took all the kids camping in Flagstaff and had a great time. We have had our share or picnics in various parks and have debated and discussed the different options required to transport everyone from point A to point B at any given time. We have a family membership to the Science Center and to the gym and have gasped at the total cost of a meal at fast food restaurants. It’s a learning curve and we are all definitely learning.
All in all, I have few, if any, complaints. I am so grateful for my family and friends that not only stood by me in less than perfect times, but also stood by me and those times passed and good times have arrived.
I will post pictures...soon...I hope.
Dear Family and Friends,
Can we just start with a great big “WOW”?! OK…so it’s been a couple years. I stand remiss at my Christmas card neglect and am back with a self-proclaimed vengeance. Brevity is not my forte, but I will do my best.
The last couple years have been tumultuous at best, but the past is mostly the past. On to bigger, brighter, happier things! Langdon and I were married in August. It was a semi-impromptu event with near-by family and friends…and couldn’t have been more perfect. There was a lot that led up to that moment, but ultimately it was just the beginning of the story we are writing one chapter at a time. Langdon moved to Surprise and we are just enjoying our new life together…figuring out details and enjoying being together. It’s been a wonderful thing for both of us to find a true partner and companion in life.
Langdon was working in Tucson, but got a job in the valley shortly after we married. He actually is now working at the same hospital I am which has been great in many ways. I finally finished nursing school in March and was fortunate enough to have a job offer prior to graduation. I am working and was able to get a job on a Progressive Care Unit and a cardiac floor as an RN at Banner Thunderbird Hospital and mostly love it. I love meeting the patients and feel blessed that I was able to get into this line of work. I also coached diving again this year and, again, am professing my retirement! We will see how that plays out in July.
The kids are all doing great and adjusting well. Garrett is 15 and has his driving permit. He dabbled in Cross Country at school and is now on the wrestling team. I think more than any of them he enjoys the role of “kid” again since Langdon came into the picture. Cole is 14 and a freshman in high school. He has discovered his love for horses and increased his love for all animals. He has changed so much this last year and has really started to come into his own. Blake is 11 and not shy about voicing his imminent 12th birthday. He is playing tackle football this year and loving that. I don’t love it quite as much. He is doing great in school and definitely has a knack for sarcasm and wit. Ethan is 9 and just such a joy to have around. He is incredibly athletic and not happy that I won’t allow him yet to play tackle football due to his size. He has a crazy pension for Beyblades and just the best smile with those great big boy teeth! Wade is 7 and has grown so much this last year. He is doing well in school and working hard at becoming the “youngest” boy instead of the “baby”. He’s accepting his new responsibilities and yet is still Mom’s “baby”. He still loves to sit and cuddle and talk about his day. His insight can be surprising.
Langdon has 4 kids of his own that we added to the already existing chaos. His oldest is Cami who is 15 and a sophomore in high school. Then there’s Logan who has also moved to Surprise and lives with us. He is 13 and in 8th grade. He has an incredible vocabulary and uses it constantly. He is incredibly witty and can definitely challenge my sarcasm. He fits in with the rest of the boys! Madison is 11 and will be 12 a week after Blake will. She is a tremendous artist and is often found drawing anything from animals to word mosaics. She’s adjusting to me being excited about having girls around. Summer is 3 and is gracious enough to allow me to dress her up to my heart’s content! She has this amazing red curly hair and is a joy to have around. She holds her own with the boys, the boys treat her like the little girl that she is, and I look forward to watching her grow.
All of us have had a good time getting to know each other and adjust to the new “family” dynamic. We took all the kids camping in Flagstaff and had a great time. We have had our share or picnics in various parks and have debated and discussed the different options required to transport everyone from point A to point B at any given time. We have a family membership to the Science Center and to the gym and have gasped at the total cost of a meal at fast food restaurants. It’s a learning curve and we are all definitely learning.
All in all, I have few, if any, complaints. I am so grateful for my family and friends that not only stood by me in less than perfect times, but also stood by me and those times passed and good times have arrived.
I will post pictures...soon...I hope.
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